Kam Napier Headshot

A. Kam Napier

Arts & Entertainment

Columnists

Onlookers were stunned on Sunday, March 29, when the famous Scottish lake monster, affectionately known as Nessie, broached the waters of the equally famous Ala Wai Canal.

[{"type":"text","text":"ASD was first on the scene, bringing you these exclusive photos."}]

We were soon joined by noted Isle cryptozoologist Sigmund Zack, who said he was alerted by postings on the private social media channel of a secretive monster hunter society.

“I never thought I’d see the day!” said Zack. “I had been saving up all my Atmos Rewards miles for a trip to Scotland and now this happens — amazing!”

The creature kept perfectly still, head in the air, as if embarrassed to be caught in the open in broad daylight.

[{"type":"text","text":"Isn’t Nessie a little far from home? we asked."}]

“It’s 42 degrees in Loch Ness,” says noted Isle cryptozoologist Sigmund Zack. “That’s Fahrenheit, it’s sounds even worse in Centigrade, just 5 or 6 degrees! So the question isn’t, ‘Why would Nessie swim 7,000 miles to vacation in Waikīkī?” it’s ‘Why wouldn’t he?”

Zack speculated on the beast’s route across the Atlantic, down the Eastern Seaboard, through the Panama Canal, past Easter Island, finally arriving in the Islands with uncanny navigational skill. Was Waikīkī its final destination?

He shrugged. “There’s just so much we don’t know about Nessie. Its mating habits, its taste in streaming content, its connection, if any, to Big Foot. So many blanks to fill!”

Could Nessie pose a threat? If, as theories suggest, the lake monster is a Plesiosaurus, a living fossil from the Jurassic period, it’s likely to be carnivorous.

At that, Zack narrowed his eyes and dashed off a quick text message to unknown parties.

“I want to assure people,” he said to ASD, “that Nessie would never use its long neck, jagged teeth, lightning reflexes and propulsive swimming ability to pluck people from the sidewalk in a flash and drag them down into the Ala Wai as a snack. Not joggers, not kids, definitely not pets. And definitely not at night, when no one would notice. Nope. Definitely not.”

A crowd had gathered. Someone noted that the long neck and apparent humps of the sinewy serpent looked suspiciously like a log carried into the canal by the recent Kona Low deluge. 

[{"type":"text","text":"Zack threw up his hands."}]

 you to think!” he exclaimed. “Listen, people, and look at these photos,” he said, taking ASD’s iPhone and rummaging through the photos without so much as a thank you.

“The first photo is from 2:48 p.m. and the creature is clearly facing makai, looking into the feeding grounds — I mean, excuse me, the 

 — of Waikīkī. Then, just 12 minutes later, he is photographed again — by a journalist, mind you — this time facing mauka, possibly toward the ball field for leaner prey, I mean, where people play.

“Now, you tell me, what kind of log can change direction on its own, huh? Only flippers can do that!”

As he wrapped up on that conclusive, scientific point, Zack handed back ASD’s phone, took one last look at the bleached, scaly, possibly bark-like hide of the beast and walked off in a hurry.

[{"type":"text","text":"Happy April Fools’ Day, everyone!"}]

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<title>Loch Ness monster spotted in Ala Wai Canal</title>

“It’s 42 degrees in Loch Ness,” says noted Isle cryptozoologist Sigmund Zack. “The question isn’t, ‘Why would Nessie swim 7,000 miles to vacation in Waikīkī?” it’s ‘Why wouldn’t he?”

Loch Ness monster spotted in Ala Wai Canal

Christian Shimabuku Headshot

Christian Shimabuku

Sports

MĀNOA — Laura Beeman loved her job, so much so that she decided it was better to walk away before she grew to resent it. 

On Monday, Beeman retired from her post as her post as the University of Hawaiʻi women's basketball team's head coach after 14 seasons. Beeman, who took over the program in 2012, went 244-180 during her time at the helm. She put out a consistent winning product, guiding the Rainbow Wahine to three NCAA Tournaments and four Big West Conference regular season titles. Additionally, the 'Bows played in four WNITs and two WBITs under Beeman.

The Rainbow Wahine most recently took the floor on March 14, losing to UC San Diego 60-48 in the Big West Championship game. Following the season, Beeman consulted with her parents, her wife, Carla, and other confidants in evaluating her desire to keep coaching in the changing college landscape, where name, image and likeness (NIL) payments dominate the conversation surrounding players. 

 checked in with Beeman last Friday, she knew it was time to have a difficult conversation. Beeman, Elliott and the rest of the athletic department took the weekend to plan for Monday's surprise announcement. 

"Honestly, it was Friday when Matt was like, 'Okay, how are you feeling? What are you thinking?' And I was like, 'Matt, I think this is it,'" Beeman told Aloha State Daily following her retirement press conference at UH-Mānoa's Gym II. "I don't know if I want to do this anymore. The landscape has changed so much. This is not what I signed up for. I still love coaching. I want to leave it when I love it, leave it when I'm still good at it. 

"I think all the stars aligned. There were a lot of moving pieces that I was like, ʻokay, this is the universe's way of telling me that would be as good a time as any,ʻ and I'm leaving the cupboards very full and this program in a really great position for the next head coach to walk in and hopefully be incredibly successful."

Following her senior year of collegiate basketball at Cal State San Bernardino, Beeman initially did not intend to enter the coaching profession until getting a call and offer from the University of Redlands about a graduate manager vacancy in 1992. Her coaching career was off and running from there. Beeman then joined Mt. San Antonio College in California, where she was the head coach for 15 years, followed by assistant coaching stints with the WNBA's Los Angeles Sparks and USC. 

At Hawai‘i, Beeman revived a program that previously hadn't been to the NCAA Tournament in 1998. She consistently won players, coaches, supporters and others close to the program over with her genuine style of coaching and interacting with people. Her ultimate goal was to help young women grow, a responsibility she took deep pride in. 

"All of them have absolutely touched my life in an amazing way, and I know right now sitting and I'll have time to reflect, but I definitely can't quantify it," Beeman said. "I just know the quality of young woman that I've been able to coach over 30 years has shaped who I am in a magnitude I never thought possible."

Beeman, 57, received her flowers from UH far before Monday's announcement. While she was still the coach, the school organized three consecutive 

 contests in her honor. The Rainbow Wahine went 3-0 in such contests. 

Monday's 3 p.m. press conference was preceded by a 2 p.m. team meeting. It's there that Beeman broke the news to her team. 

"I knew (telling the team) was going to be hard. Met with the girls and just told them to trust our process, that they trusted it, and they believe that something magical was going to happen in the season, and to trust that Matt and the athletic department are going to find the best next coach," Beeman said. "It could be an external candidate, could be an internal candidate, and to trust that process, to trust that the work that they have laid does not have to go away, and that the core group can still do magical things and right now where they're hurting a little bit, to not lose sight of why they did what they did and how they did it, to give it until the new coach is announced, and to make a decision based on that, that I'm still going to be around. 

"I don't know what capacity, but I'm not leaving Hawai‘i. I'm still going to be around soon. I can buy them lunches legally and spend time with them in a different way, continue to be a part of that mental health that I felt was so vital to their success, and just do it in a different way. A lot of tears, but more love. So, as hard as it was, I do believe that they will leave that meaning understanding that trusting the process is something that they will take with them throughout their life, and it will benefit them in their relationships and their jobs. I trust that group of young women to do what is right."

With the NCAA transfer portal set to open on April 6 for women's basketball players, Elliott acknowledged that there is urgency to make the new hire in expeditious fashion. At the same time, a national search will ensue to ensure the program has the best possible coach. 

"I feel extreme urgency from the standpoint of that's what's most important for our student-athletes," Elliott told ASD. "They've got to make a decision. I hope and expect every single one of them will want to stay here because of this place. It's not just about one person. It's about Hawai‘i. It's about playing here, representing these fans being at this school, but at the same time, they deserve to know who their head coach is going to be, and that will inform their decision. The search has started as of (Monday) afternoon, and we will now begin and hopefully get through that in the next couple of weeks to have a final answer very soon."

Beeman has accompanied Elliott to multiple House and Senate hearings pertaining to NIL, speaking on behalf of her program and their needs. Of UH-Mānoa's $5 million NIL funding request toward the Legislature last fall, Beeman was requesting $450,000 annually for her program, hypothetically stating that $800,000 could make the team dominant. She plans to continue to advocate for the team publicly during her retirement. 

"Going to those hearings was something that I thoroughly enjoyed, because I felt like a voice of experience mattered, seeing it from both sides," Beeman said. "But I do think the landscape, the grind, I think that's going to be the unintended consequence of NIL and transfer portal: a lot of coaches are going to leave because of the grind, and I don't think people looked at that part of making the decisions to have NIL. 

"I do believe in paying kids. I don't have a problem with that. There has to be a different mechanism in place to make it more sustainable."

In her immediate future, Beeman will still be around for the team during their offseason workouts. She also wants to be present when the new coach is announced. After that, she'll continue to live in Hawai‘i, where she can finally enjoy some of the things that had to take a backseat during basketball season. 

"I want to decorate Christmas trees. I want to burn a turkey," Beeman said. "I've missed 30 years of holidays away from my family, away from my continent friends, and it's just time for a different chapter for me. I have amazing parents, and they always taught me if you borrow someone's car and they give it to you with half a tank, you return it with a full tank and cleaner than you found it. And I can honestly say that this program has a full tank and it's cleaner than I found it."

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Laura Beeman 033126

<title>Hawai‘i women's basketball head coach Laura Beeman announces retirement</title>

Beeman, who took over for the Rainbow Wahine in 2012, went 244-180 in 14 seasons with UH.

Hawai‘i women's basketball head coach Laura Beeman announces retirement

Stephanie Salmons Headshot

Stephanie Salmons

Real Estate

A Tantalus home that once belonged to actor Richard Chamberlain 

Perched above Honolulu, the 1.8-acre property at 3711 Round Top Drive — listed by Derek Kamm and Schyler Murakami with Coldwell Banker Island Properties — offers views of Diamond Head, the Pacific and the city below.

Murakami told Aloha State Daily Thursday that there are three homes on the property: a 4-bed, 3.5-bath main house that's roughly 3,700 square feet; a 2-bedroom, 1-bath guest house that's about 1,100 square feet; and a studio — along with some large, grassy areas; a tennis court; and an infinity-edge pool.

"It's pretty unique once you're up there," he told ASD. The property, he says, is peaceful and secluded.

"What the current owners like about it is how secluded it is, yet you're 20 minutes away from Honolulu or from Waikīkī."

According to Murakami, the current owners have owned the property for about 20 years and purchased it from Chamberlain's estate. The property hit the market about two weeks ago.

Murakami says you'd likely see a handful of homes for sale on Round Top Drive and in Tantalus each year, but it's rare to see large estates like this.

Chamberlain, a longtime Hawai‘i resident, was known for his leading roles in the 1960s TV series "Dr. Kildare," 1980's "Shōgun," 

3711 Round Top Drive interior

<title>Tantalus home that once belonged to Richard Chamberlain on the market for $8 million</title>

Perched above Honolulu, you'll find the 1.8-acre property at 3711 Round Top Drive.

Tantalus home that once belonged to Richard Chamberlain on the market for $8 million

Crime & Courts

Advocacy journalism from Civil Beat last week asserts that the whole city wants the next HPD chief of police to be a political warrior. Does it? Seems the next chief has their work cut out for them on improving the basics. Here's data on how HPD performs at clearing crimes.

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Pipikaula Corner: Who says “Honolulu wants an anti-ICE police chief?”

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Michael Brestovansky

An unidentified man is in custody after a pair of stabbing incidents on Thursday in Kapolei and McCully. Story updated 3/9 with information on the alleged attacker.

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Updated: Thursday stabbing attacks leave one dead, one injured

A Navy petty officer and an Air Force lieutenant colonel have been respectively sentenced and convicted for sexually exploiting minors online.

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Two military officers busted for child sex exploitation

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Rick Hamada

The crime should be considered a capital offense, but Hawai‘i doesn't go that for in dealing with even the most heinous crimes, writes ASD columnist Rick Hamada.

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Hamada: Hawai‘i needs to get serious about stopping sex-trafficking

Eric Walsh was shot 15 times in Waikīkī following a string of bank robberies.

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HPD justified in 2024 Waikīkī fatal shooting

Devan Caulk pled guilty last year to producing child pornography via Instagram.

Honolulu man sentenced to 15 years for sexually extorting minors

Rebecca Folley made hundreds of Facebook posts threatening to kill Presidents Joe Biden and Donald Trump.

Pearl City woman gets supervised release following threats against the president

Government & Politics

The Pre-Eviction Mediation Filing Program requires landlords to offer mediation before evicting a tenant for not paying rent

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Tenants facing eviction can seek mediation under new state program

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Tom Yamachika

Viewpoints

There are two Hawaiʻi Supreme Court cases pending that involve fights over the extent to which courts can get involved with the Department of Taxation.

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Community Voices: Tax versus Judiciary

Daniel Farr 02

Daniel Farr

Mahuna has been offered the position of Hawaiʻi County police chief following a nationwide search and strong public support, the Hawaiʻi County Police Commission announced Friday.

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Reed Mahuna named police chief after nationwide search

Two state bills would lower the threshold for drunk driving from .08 to .05.

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Green backs BAC reduction bills

Hawai‘i Island police seize hundreds of pounds of narcotics, dozens of firearms and hundreds of thousands of dollars in cash in first year after units merged.